Saturday, December 31, 2011

Buckwheat pancakes

I got the best recipe from my girlfriend, Trish, so I call them Trish's pancakes.

I'll post the recipe soon. Just have to get to an Internet connection.
2 cups buckwheat flour
1/2 cup cornmeal
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. sea salt
2-2 1/2 cups water (usually I sub coconut milk for milk, but this one is truly better with water)
1 Tbsp. oil (I use coconut oil)
1 Tbsp. maple syrup
1 tsp. cinnamon
Cook on your griddle:) even kids love. this one!
Thanks Trish

Gluten Free Apple Pie
With the holidays and family gatherings, which of course include food, I get to now plan ahead. Preparing yummy things so my oldest and I can enjoy what everyone else is partaking of. This was a great one and my son, who is a picky eater, only loved the crust. I'm not complaining that I had to eat the whole pie myself since Christmas Eve! On a side note, I ran across coconut milk eggnog, so instead of making it from scratch, I got to grab it from the fridge each time all the boys wanted some, no long process;)
I enjoyed the holidays! Well, I still am!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Meditating on....

Blog notes:
A letter to my close family and friends, but worthy sharing on my long over due blog writing time.
An update on Colby and the things we are learning.
I started calling ALTA, whom we used when Colby was 2 ¾ years old, to see if they could assess him again . Our concern was that he was possibly on the autism spectrum. I was feeling really overwhelmed in many areas, trying to figure out why small things are so difficult for Colby. I wanted to know where I needed to be patient and where possibly I needed to be pushing him. It’s a hard as a parent, and I’m sure we all question that we are giving enough to our children. I’d have to say through this process it’s taught me that parents really know their children best, God gave me my 3 children, He knows what He is doing, it’s helped me to start having more faith in myself, too.
I’ve kept most of you up to date, but it’s taken a while to finish assessments through the school district, and we aren’t finished yet. They recently assessed his speech and language and he was just a point off of qualifying for services, good, but he has to qualify to have the school district consider an Occupational Therapist assessing him and possibly receiving services. The speech therapist said that she was making a professional decision based on his pragmatic delay (and the hope of an O.T. seeing him). So she qualified him for speech and language. She was kind enough to give me a test that the O.T. would look at, and suggested I fill it out to bring to our next meeting, which won’t happen till January due to upcoming holidays. The report we got back via ALTA, said that an O.T. is experienced with children who have Sensory Processing Disorder and can help teach skill to the children to cope, grow and my hope, if this is the route God takes us, to learn tools for us to help, also. I’ve also been trying to figure out how to help his poor muscle tone, something that we’ve been aware of since the last assessment when he was almost 3.
Each time I’ve come away from these assessments its, been difficult, my own emotions swaying this way and that. Wanting to have a direction, afraid they’d miss something, being told I was doing a great job, keep it up, but I wanted a few professionals to make sure. Each time I’m done with a test, form or assessment, I would cry. I’ve processed letting go of my own expectations, seeing where Colby stands based on tests, fears I’ll fail him, and realizing again and again, how God sees my son, learning to TRUST God. I (think) that I’m trusting God either way now….knowing which ever route He takes us is best.
One of the main reasons, besides to update you where we are at in all this….is the things that have been coming to mind. I keep meditating on the fact that while I was in labor with Colby, many of you had prophetic words, that he’d be a boy, that he would be a worship leader, these words I have held to seeing Colby the way God sees Him, His purpose in my son’s life. It also comforts me to know my God knows what I’m going through and He preplanned these words for me to hold onto when I couldn’t see clearly. Megan, my sister, shared a vision 2 years ago, of Colby worshiping, and an anointing on the musical notes she saw floating through the air…affecting people, the people knowing God through the worship music. Another word I hold onto waiting to see how God molds my son into His image. As I know God’s love, I begin to take off my own expectations, to trust God’s hand in Colby’s life. To let go of how I thought life would be, of what I thought was ‘normal’, and be grateful for a wonderful amazing gift of who my son is. Colby teaches me to have fun, let go, laugh, I meet new people everywhere we go, he’s so friendly! People are drawn to him and his personality. He is a gift.
Recently at a Bible study, we were reading the passage in Genesis 25:22. It’s about Rebecca going to inquire of God about her pregnancy. It sparked my heart to do the same. Have I asked God? (there were times I may have, but fear kept me from hearing). I went home that night, while laying in bed, asked God “What is it you want me to do for Colby? “ Right away, I heard, “ Play with him” and then saw a picture of Colby and I jumping on a trampoline, looking each other in the eyes. The next morning, I wanted to see if there was anything else God wanted to say. I felt God say to try singing to him. So I’m trying it when I remember. We’ve been playing more games, jumping in the living room and laughing together.
I would have to say some of my favorite times with Colby are in the car, loudly worshipping, lifting our hands, and Colby loudly praying for God to come….Colby truly has a heart to worship and I love getting to be a part of his life.
I’ll keep you up to date as we figure out what’s next. But for now, we are having fun!

Monday, May 16, 2011


So when you begin this journey of parenthood - I know everyone says how life altering it is! But the everyday changes,and let's just say re-adjustments to these changes is sometimes breaking and re-building. At least at times that's how I feel. Small things are changing your day for a kid who is sick. Another example is happening as I write! It's snowing. So now my trip to the store after Adam is home for a few things may need to be readjusted. I know this is a normal part of life, kids or not. I just notice it when all the small life altering changes pile up (and have a mini break down). It's so good to realize that as I die (let go)to some of the things I want to do or thought I could do, I get to sit back and figure out how I can change or adjust to my life.
Truthfully you think I am joking about a mini break down, but no. It did feel good to voice all the things I didn't expect or imagine were a part of parenthood. I think, like so many parents, you don't realize where you end and where you as a parent begins. I am unsure how to best word it, but you are so connected yet must know who you are. Making the choice to give up parts of yourself, while you help your children to become who they are to be. Knowingly setting aside that ride on the quad so you can make dinner, while enjoying the fact that under all this parenting is a fun person ready to ride and yell with the thrill of life. That glimpse that parts of old (young) are still there, bring hope on these uncharted territories.
Being able to make a call to a experienced mom, to know it's ok to not be able to handle everything dished out or to find relief that not being able to be what you thought you should be and trusting your kids are going to do fine.
My expectations for others and myself are changing. A fine balance between hope and truth.
Finding my steps on this journey.....

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

blogging w/out boys

AHhhhh...yes, I'm acutally blogging w/no help from my 3 helpful little men. I am out doing 'errands' at my hubbies office (and fast internet). So before I truly go to the grocery store, wanted to say hello.
pictures I do not have....still finding time to save them and upload them at my hubbies office. No time for that, yet.
Life is getting 'easier' I'd say. It's wierd to have a clean house (some days) and get dinner on the table at a decent hour and even have time to go out once in a while. I guess that is life when you're kids are over 2 and 4.
I'm not saying each day is easy, I tend to stress over what to make at night...and try to start it by 3/4 pm so I can get in on the table for my boys before it's actually bed time. Still the process of I like to eat yummy food and sometimes that's not 'kid' food at all. Spicy, or cabbage or weird things they don't like. Some nights it's just eat it or not. Others, it's a bit of this and that they like and a nice meal for the hubby and I.
Back to some easier days....I know for sure I need another baby w/ the way life is. (Ok, I want one everyday since the past year+)......but now that life is getting a bit more calm. I know I'm ready.
For sure there are crazy days, such as, yesterday, where we started snack/lunch at 10:30 and naps didn't really start till 12:30 = WHAT! and then it took the boys an hour to fall asleep!! I had dreams last night of feeling so out of control, lack of sleep and 3 deliriously (happy) boys is scary! Let's just say body slamming (the fun kind) starts.....and my voice is on mute to their ears, seriously...???
Today is  special day: I get to go to the grocery store w/out small children. I really should go, so I can go pick them up. A very close family friend said she'd love to play/watch them, I said, "Yes, please."
Enough of my boring ventings....on a fun note, researched today (on a fast internet server = very exciting) more home school ideas....for reading, etc. And, a camera. Yes, I can barely believer it. My hubby is donating to my camera fund (out of a bonus he had)....and instead of's soon. My sis-in-law and a few others are helping me learn a bit more before I make a choice.  Would love thoughts on a good digital camera...and some basic start. Software? (for a Mac). Well, fun, is full of surprises.
Off to the exciting life of shopping w/out boys!