And I'm not just talking about setting your clock back this Fall, which does by the way have me way off and all messed up. I mean, really my kids and crazy non-naps, but enough about things that will always be changing, as in kids and the times we live in.
I am learning to live in a Peace like no other.....to grow, stretch and be set free of my own burdens. Worrying what people think, trying to please everyone (and i mean everyone), listening to voices that are not my own, nor my Creator. But enough, I am learning to say "no". To love who God made me, to trust who God made me, to listen to the voice I know as Jesus', to have faith and trust in my God and myself, to quit putting expectations on people that are unrealistic, to love, to change, to be strong, to be firm, to be who I am and was meant to be and wow, it's so much more FUN! Life is way more exciting when you are being YOU {e.g. me being ME}. I often have taken notes of those around me who are strong and trust what they feel and believe, my sister Heather, as well as friends Mary and Krystin, among others. I feel like I see strengths sometimes I haven't grown in or chosen to make mine, and so I took notes, but now I'm writing my own book (not really unless you include this long blog)....it's a metaphor for taking charge of my life! It's nice when you can 'see' in your life things that have been brewing and growing and all of the sudden you make a few good choices and you have an awesome pile of fruit (again, not really, just a metaphor or something like that - I learn from seeing things usually).
It's fun to enjoy my new perspective on life and take life as it comes through these new 'glasses'.....you catch my drift.....
I have so much to share (or at least journal to myself here, for now and later - you may be realizing I'm a verbal processor). I'd have to say one of the best and hardest things has been living about 20-30 mins from all those I know, including family. I've been on my 'own' alone, for days on end. A husband who is so tired at the end of the day that he falls asleep on the couch most nights and weekends.....helps the picture, too. Being alone w/myself (and my 3 kids) has been the hardest thing I've ever done. Those who are extroverts probably relate, as well as those who are moms. It's the hardest most revealing job I've ever done. And I've gotten to really know myself in it all, too. Not always liking what I see, or knowing how to change, or sometimes just realizing that me is just right. I am by nature a social butterfly, I could be out every night playing w/friends, if that was 'real' life, but for me now it's loving my family and it seems that means only going out once a month or so. (Don't worry, I hope continually to go out more...but may be a few years down the road).
I think I should sign off for now, as my coffee is wearing off (from the baby shower I just got back from) and start a sewing a gift for another party tomorrow.....I'm loving this weekend already!
I have so much more to write and share, a lot is happening, but more on that at a later and less tired time.
