Persective

A follow up of sorts on my last post....
I realize, that some of life is our perspective and what we put our HOPE in.
I had a wonderful chat with an amazing woman (and sister), also known as Auntie Amby.
I'm gonna jump ahead to a conversation w/ my mom and then back to Aunti Amby.
My mom said something that impacted me, those things that just are like a 'key' and help you process and let go. She said, "It's ok to grieve....for what you've felt you've lost, but Colby is still the same person, and you can make the choice to enjoy who he has always been." {This is how I heard and processed what she said....and so thankful to make a switch in my emotions and thinking}. I realized I was grieving, feeling overwhelmed, unsure if I was doing anything right in the past or now, what would I do in the future? As I let go of my expectations of what I thought, and I realized that my Colby is my Colby, he hasn't changed. I am going to enjoy every moment and not second guess myself, God made me his Mom for a purpose and a plan and for this time of his life. I am his, and he is mine.
Ok, back to my lovely sister, Auntie Amby (Colby nicknamed her this, and I don't think she wants him to change it) - She is a lover and a loyal sis. As she was baking her pumpkin bread, because she felt she was supposed to. Laura {one of my other sisters, yes, I have 7, and is amazing, she knows how to be weak and strong all in the same moment}was over for the evening, and when Amber found out she needed it for Laura's daughter's (our niece) school day, she understood why she'd been prompted, not that it would ever be bad to bake and eat pumpkin bread!
I had fun listening to Amber, and then we began talking about all the past few days of developmental testing for Colby. Amber loves him so much, she actually loves all his mimicking and echoing. They call it something else, it's actually pretty and sounds like a girl's name. Amber began to speak love and truth - at least that's what I heard - and told me how she and her roomies (who are like my sisters) are looking for creative ways to play w/colby so they too can be a part of connecting and loving him. The support is amazing. She reminded me that we had all helped in Michele's life (one of my other sisters, who became deaf at 10 months old), and that Michele is not a 'deaf' person because of all the love and relationship and teaching we all did together. She also said that I was going to have fun (she's beginning to prophesy and a girl needs that when she's feeling down and unsure).....that I would enjoy and learn from God how to teach, play and work w/ Colby. I felt a peace and assurance as we continued to talk and finally could quit crying....it's been a long day of spontaneous tears from me. {Pause, babies are awake now}
{Ok, they are eating their wheat free waffles, happily} I felt so loved by my sister, Amber and ready to face the day (well, the night and I was actually out on the town, otherwise known as going to the grocery store). As I shopped, and enjoyed my outing, my mom called to see how Adam, Colby and I were all doing with the progress of testing so far. Colby seems so good after the testing, he loves the one on one, but the day after was harder because he wanted only that, and no individual play or group play. Adam, still processing....but so far, I think, we are on the same page. One of the possibilities for occupational and speech therapy are a special education preshcool, where he could possibly go 5 days a week. My goal in all of this is to get my hands on tools, teach myself, whatever I can do to work w/ Colby. Adam and I have both felt that Colby being gone 5 days a week is not what we want. We may settle for letting him go 2 days for some therapy time and that way I can have some special time with Kyle and Ryan, too. We will see.....it's all in the beginning. (I have a feeling his special nutrition needs are important in all of this, and that some of this may be worse right now, than we first thought, but I think they [the testing gals] don't want to label him too soon.)

Now, onto a day of love, joy, and peace in loving my Jesus and enjoying my kids....oh, and some dishes from breakfast! Did I mention that I love my boys! Don't forget to let the Light shine on your perspective, today.

Testing....1, 2, 3

5,7,9,10......just thoughts after a very long and interesting day yesterday. I've not really mentioned this to many, but have started to. I've noticed for a while, that Colby is very much the copy cat, but isn't every kid....As I've observed him and his brothers....I began to question his development, was I getting through to him? Am I doing everything I can/should to help him grow and develop? Maybe it's not me? What should I do? Help?
So, we are doing some testing to see.....
And today, not sure why, after yesterday was insightful, I just am crying.....not really sure why (didn't I just say that)? I think it's many things, a humble cry to God, a resting and letting go of expectations, a loving that continues to grow for my child (all of them of course), a deeper need for God, hearing Him speak each day.....and then little things, like I'm tired, and I don't know how to do this w/Adam  (process and all), that I want to 'fight' for my kid and help him do his best anyway it takes (that's the Momma- bear....), and above all that I will stand and trust in my God. I don't understand it all.....but I have a PEACE. God keeps saying, "A plan and a Purpose" and "a Purpose and a time", so I am listening and seeking.
I read something that I enjoyed last night, relaxing and processing over a cup of tea and some yummy banana bread (from my mom-in-law, Wendy) -alone w/God. This was on my tea bag, it said, "Fight for your opinions, but do not believe that they contain the whole truth, or the only truth", I am going to stand strong.....I want the best for my kid. I know God gave me Colby, and that I'm his Mom for a reason. I'm blessed to get to make the decisions that will shape (some) of who he's to become....and above all I pray He grows to have a heart for our Saviour.
I am learning to fear God and know His will for my life (and my family). To trust the things God has spoken and continues to speak.
The other day I was driving w/my mom....(maybe I blogged this already), but we were trying to find a way home, and I didn't think we could do it, my mom was going off route...through crazy roads, but through our silly adventure, I learned to not fear man or authorities (unhealthy version), to trust God, even when it looks like it won't work, that we'll get there. I even heard/felt God say, He had us do this on purpose - it was a message and prophetic all in one, and something I needed to 'hear' for more of the journey ahead.

Besides this interesting journey of developmental testing and all the other stuff you do.....I am thinking today about my brother in law, Jeff Duncan. Today is would have been his 33rd birthday. Today he is celebrating with Jesus! I am so in love with Jesus today, and though sad/happy, and not understanding these tears that fall, I know there is lot God is doing in my life and others.
Above all else, choose LIFE! As my great-grandfalther would say, "I am alive in the land of the living!" Amen - so be it.

Selah....and I'll be back later.

Sisters in Santa Cruz

Can you believe I got to go on a trip...yep! Thanks to my mom, Wendy (mom-in-law) and hubby, Adam. The last time I'd gone away from my baby (s) (Colby only at that time) was when he was 16 months old. All I did was miss him and wish we had him with us. Adam wanted a last 'break' since we'd just found out I was pregnant with twin boys. So, I tried again, and better success at being away and not being too 'kid sick' {home sick, etc....}.

Yes, sisters, just the 7 of us (minus Mallory our newest sister, Eddie's wife) and my (our) Mom. It took some working out lots of schedules from work to kids to car rides, etc....
We got to stay at a cute cottage (well, we had 2 for our trip) overlooking the ocean and a short walk to a somewhat private little cove. We enjoyed each and every min. of it. It's not often (pretty much never happens) that we can get us all together (imagine trying to add our 7 brothers and Dad to this, too, and the fact that Eddie/Mal is in TX) in one place.....and we love family/friends, so we always have a big party going on. But it was nice, just the sisters. Good sister bonding, sharing the same memories we made, stories we shared, tears we shed, laughter we bellowed, and love we feel.
I am thankful to be loved, pushed, hugged, and all that incorporates being a sister (the oldest, too) in my big family. We are dynamic (I know) and I love being with each and every one of my sisters. {I also am going to blog some stories on each family member...so you can better get to know my wonderful family - sometime in the future around dusting and folding laundry}.
Favorite memoires of our trip: #1 Bathrooms, saw a few on this trip, hee, hee
#2 Eating, yep, our life revolves around this, and drinks
#3 the Ocean
#4 Heather's comments on seeing the ocean and the wildlife that is a part of it
#5 Time shared with my sisters, getting to bond with each of them and also realize that we are all pretty close (and now closer)
#6 The Hope I have....that keeps pushing me forward {sometimes pulling, too}

It was all great, but I'm thankful to be me in a my big family!

3 toddlers = How many strollers?

You can never have too many strollers, contrary to popular opinions in my home (um, Adam, my husband, who is a clean and organized person and thinks they clutter our garage). I have found you need many for each and every different kind of outing. I'm sure my cousin, Faith will attest to this necessity, too.
I am a mom who enjoys babywearing, but sometimes there are days, the stroller is in high demand.
I've noted before some of my baby wearing combos I've attempted....(I think it's under babywearing)...and am still playing around with.
Back to strollers, Adam likes a clean garage, let me preface, and right now, no, it doesn't look like that.
I have gotten rid of a single stroller that worked with a infant car seat, no longer in need of a single. I only have 4 strollers now.
My single umbrella, my double umbrella (minus the umbrellas), my triple long Peg Prego (which was a gift second hand to me, and has now lost 2 of the 3 sunshades - lots of Vit. D in our family), and my most favorite all around, the Valco Tri Mode single....and more on all of these.
The single umbrella - a good go to, quick errand with Colby only (Colby is my oldest going on a whole whopping 3 years).
The double umbrella - a good go to for a quick in and out of the car (which I really try to refrain from every even needing to do this), I can put both twins in and Colby 'helps' push {he is really holding on for safety}, or a twin and Colby in the stroller and then putting a twin in a baby carrier of some type, usually my Ergo.

My triple long, good for the Fair, though terrible turning ability. I've used it for walks around my neighborhood when I want to go more than 1 mph. Meaning all 3 kids are in it. But it's very big for storage, takes about 5 mins to put together and 5 mins to take apart. I loved it when they were little....though I really needed something for 2 infants and 1 toddler, my choice, just stay home (for that phase). I think I'll be craigslisting it soon to go to my upgrade a stroller fund...

The Valco....a few of my friends turned me onto this, and though pricey, was a gift at Colby's baby shower. I loved the fact that I could attach the infant seat (with an attachment that I of course bought), later it became my everywhere stroller (didn't have an umbrella stroller, yet, when Colby was little)....a bit heavy and big to lift and load, but great for all terrains. I have a Honda Pilot that I load up everything in my large back area (second line of seats are down). I'm short enough {if I was a runner} that Valco would work as a jogger for me. But off-road hikes and trails were possible with this baby {baby and stroller}. When I found out I was pregnant with my 2nd baby {really 3rd pregnancy} (we didn't know until 5 1/2 months we were having twin boys)...I proceeded to get ready to pack away my rain cover, my sun insect cover and get ready to buy the twin seat that attaches to it. So it's a double 'long', though it's not long at all. I love being able to turn it with one hand....especially when I've got Colby in tow, walking or 'helping' me push. It has a great sunshade built in for both the regular seat and one you can purchase for the toddler seat, which both my twins can use....easily. The sunshade (I broke, I guess I didn't open it properly and bent the mental repeatedly....until, it broke, but still functions)......has a net in back, and that can work (I've found) as a good head support for the one who passes out in front. I usually either put both twins in or Colby and a twin, and wear the other baby.

Now, onto....my next pick. The The Valco double tri mode with a toddler seat. I know there are a lot out there for moms of 2 or maybe more...but it's hard to really find one for me. I found a few on an Australian website that looked great for 3-4 kids! I wish they were closer or I lived there, ha, ha. I guess not as many moms of multiples or children close in age go out? Well, I love to be on the go, I do admit it's slowed down due to so many nap times, but I like to be able to get out when I can.
We were at the air show, juggling our kids around with the Valco and the Ergo.....and I ran into a fellow mom of twin boys, who had a big brother the same age as Colby...and little did I know the Vaclo came out with  a double side by side, with a toddler seat on the front, that you can buy a sun shade for....! As you can probably tell I am really excited! I have since then looked around for them....I'm gonna watch Craigslist for one...I did see a good deal, but didn't jump on it. I think since then they've also come out with some upgrades on this new model!
For me, and my kids, who are close in age....I'm hoping to start finding a good deal...and then hopefully sell (some) of the ones I have. Did I mention the new one at Valco...also has a step for the back, so you could actually have 4! Gotta be prepared....right.

Pumpkin Patch 2009

So, you'll find I may be blogging current to past events...but I don't want to miss 'journaling' all our fun and adventures.

Yes, we made it to the pumpkin patch.
Bierwagens pumpkin patch (yeah, know I know how to upload a link so you can go to it, too). We've been going since Colby was a baby....and now it's so fun to be there when all my kids can walk and enjoy it.

Pumpkins, hay bales, lots of animals, and family!
My favorite....oh, besides the yummy treats.
We got the boys their pumpkins and will carve later this month.

Not Me! Mondays!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.


This fun blog that I follow and laugh and learn with has a Not Me! Monday! I thought it'd be fun to give it a try.


I don't every stay in my sweats after working out for the whole day, and then just before my hubby gets home change.
I don't enjoy emailing while my kids are first waking up.....
I don't every feel like my 3 kids and I are going a hundred different directions.
I don't enjoy watching my kids splash in their spilled milk, and then have to tell them all to stop.
I am most defiantly not watching my kids make a mess of the end of breakfast as I write this....


Oh, and after the pumpkin patch this weekend, I didn't for sure rush around my house a min ahead of my in-laws arriving for a meal not even started, no, Not Me!
Ok, that was fun!


Now to see if I can finish the fun.

My birthday

All the girls, minus a few who had to get home after frozen yogurt

This blog is late in coming, but my motto is better late than never (most of the time).

I just have to blog about the best birthday time or week.

I am blessed with many who love me....and was asked by my good friend, Mary (Mary, I don't know how to add your website in reference...help?), if she could throw me a birthday party.

Let me just preface that I really love my birthday, reasons to party, reasons to give gifts (or receive them). Now, being a Mom, you really appreciate the time and love that goes into organizing a little shin-dig. This year I thought I don't really care what I do (but deep down I did).... was so glad when Mary organized a small gathering of moms to go out on the town. We really lived it up in Grass Valley, by visiting our local frozen yogurt shop {we've not had one for a long, long time until the past few months}, and then seeing a chic flick. We saw Jennifer Aniston's movie, Love Happens, a good film, but not really a light and funny one, the way they'd like you to believe. I really wouldn't recommend seeing it to someone who's recently lost a love one or lost a love one in a car accident. Still a good movie, just a deeper more serious one than the previews portray. On a lighter note, I was blessed with some great lotions and candles, a hand crafted purse ( Mary), and a new pattern, oh, and a cooking magazine...what a wondeful nite out!

I love when birthdays don't end there.....lots of phone calls and the Happy Birthday song sung or left on my voicemail. Facebook messages....and of course birthday cards, which I display proudly for a month at least...(yes, they are still up).

The weekend following my birthday we went camping {another post to come...soon} and my family and close friends surprised me with a decorated cabin, some fine wines to taste, lovely jewelry and lots of love. It was so fun to celebrate all week long.

There are probably a few fun things I'm forgetting since it's been almost a month, but my lovely sister (in-law), Gaia, made me a beautiful bracelet (which now that my kids are older, I can now wear jewelry again). {Gaia makes some lovely jewelry, I have received it as gifts and also purchased from her to give as gifts...}.

Oh, I can't forget my shopping spree, yes! About a week before my birthday, I {started eating better and excersising} felt frustrated at living in sweats that don't fit, yes, sweats that didn't fit right...that's pretty bad. I had a few outfits that would work for the public {and no I don't wear my sweats out like some Grass Valleyians believe is ok}. All the clothes I have, and yes, Mom, I do have lots! But they are all smaller than my current build will allow to fit into. I've given a lot to my sisters, Megan and Kara and still I have more...that somehow don't fit. So, even with the fact that I knew from living healthier, I'd again be wearing some of my clothes that were packed away, I need a to get some new clothes, and FAST. Of course, I wish someone was there to help me pick things out, but being that Heather was watching my kids, I had to speed through the consignment store and quickly find myself a few good outfits. I did ok.....I found a pair of jeans for now, and one for later (risky, but once I make the choice in my head I'm usually set) - my goal jeans. A few good skirts (yes, I know it's Fall, and almost too cold already, but I realize skirts fit the build better and are way more comfy, too) and a few nice tops. It is hard when 1/2 the styles are still focused on looking maternity, even if they aren't, and so I tried my best with what was there....I am a happy girl. My shopping trip was a much needed therapy, and clothing fix, as well as, a birthday present from Adam's Mom and Grandma (birthday $). I don't want to forget to mention, that I finally used my make-up gift certificate, this same day! Yes, thanks to Heather watching the kids while I shopped (she was with me), I was able to use my Christmas gift certificate to buy some much needed make up (that I still find I rarely have the time to put on). It felt like a shopping extravaganza.

And last but not least.....I got to shop downtown for my sister (in-law), Mallory's birthday and also, found (with a birthday $ from my Grandma Jackie) a wonderful pair of jeans at this boutique shop I love (and on sale)! www.latedaboutique.com

A really great birthday, another year older, and feeling better with each year! I could say I'm like good wine, but that would be cheesy. And now to celebrate more birthdays...in October.

Shabby Apple

I have ran across this dress on http://www.shabbyapple.com/ via http://makingmyamericandream.blogspot.com/2009/10/fall-into-fashion-for-mom-shabby-apple.html?sand am in love with the Carousel dress

I am entering Piece of Me to see if I can win a fabulous dress. I am still learning all this fun blogging stuff and have now shrunk my font....but follow my link and see....it'll be fun!

Things that people say...

I know we all ponder and wonder at the things people say. I know, I for one, have not always thought before I spoke.....(still current at times and find my foot in my mouth).

But...these are the things I hear when I go out with my boys, and even with one of my sisters to help.

#1: "Wow, You've got your hands full." - I hear this the most, and just smile and say "Yes, and I'm blessed", or something like this...but after literally saying this 10 times even on the same aisle at the grocer store (that is, when one of my wonderful sisters or parents aren't watching them so I have some alone time at the store). I begin to wonder what I should say....so I'm practicing on whoever is listening.....I'm also wondering what you say or would say to respond?

I've thought I could say: "My heart is full, too." Or...."Yes, and I'm so blessed", or "Actually, I don't have enough hands, do you want to come over and help".

I have to admit I must look like a funny show to some, as I maneuver my kids, in strollers and back packs and carts.....to peruse (a word I for sure picked up from Adam) the aisle in search of my food and other items.

I have found some people shocked at me, others tell me what a wonderful job I'm doing, and even the same person will tell others through the store how amazing I am. That's nice to hear.

I now...can't remember really any others for the moment, I guess this one I hear so much, and wonder how people come up with this stuff.....I don't think I'd ever even think to say that to someone.

Ok, now I remember...."What a beautiful family you have," "I was a twin," "All boys?" - I always respond truthfully to this one, "I'm hoping for a few girls, next". Others say "You must have a lot of fun" - which is so very true!

I know growing up....people were not always kind. They were rude, to my Mom, in front of us....even (especially) Christians, so odd. I don't know what is so bad or sad to 'people' about a large family. I was so blessed and loved growing up. I hope God blesses me with many children. I am so glad my heart agrees with Him, Children are a blessing, a reward (paraphrased)....I can't imagine my life any other way.

For those who may not know me...I grew up in a wonderful family. I am the oldest of 13 kids. We also were blessed to have a few cousins and friends live with us from time to time. I felt so loved, spoiled and surrounded at all times with wonderful relationships (I still am). We always had our 'needs' met and then some. So, yes, I know my 3 boys are blessed to have one another, besides all of their uncles, aunties, cousins, Tita/Grandmas, Pappas, and more....

I may sometime talk more about this.....and let you know how I do in really saying what I think, since so many others seem to have that freedom already.

{And while writing this post, it got very quiet in the living room....we all know what too quiet means! Yes, my twins somehow had the fortune of find the bathroom door open, as well as, the toilet seat up! Their first time...and wish I could say the last to make toilet soup. Colby came and told me and found them just in time before the toy giraffe became soup, too.}